March Earworm Madness 2018

Bracket of Earworm songs
Image Credit: PrintYourBracket.com + N Engineer

This time of year is all about basketball. Specifically, the NCAA tournament. Well, if you’ve had it up to your ears in basketball, perhaps I can help. Instead of following that tournament, try your hand at this alternative contest. That’s right, it’s time for the March Earworm Madness 2018! For the rest of this month, spend every waking minute trying to figure out which is the most annoying song out there in terms of earworminess.

I’ve created divisions based on television theme songs, children’s songs, and general songs. The general songs are not divided by time, but include past and present earworms. Pick the wormier song of each pair of songs, then keep going until you have discovered the most annoying song.

Suggested implementations include playing the two songs over and over, then shutting off all sounds until you determine which song refuses to leave your consciousness. Then try again with the next pair. I haven’t yet determined what the optimal number of repetitions leads to the most accurate results. Perhaps you could try to play both songs for thirty minutes before going to sleep, then determine the winner by which one you’re singing as you wake up the next morning.

If nothing else, this exercise will either help you discover the most annoying song in the history of music, or will have you welcome the mental relief of watching round after round of college basketball.