How To Lose A Guy Gardner In Ten Days #1 – Kenny Porter, Aaron J. Waltke, Danny Lore, Marguerite Sauvage, Alex Galer, Dennis Hopeless, Brendan Hay, George Mann, Writers; Nick Robles, Ivan Shavrin, Ted Brandt/Ro Stein, Marguerite Sauvage, Derek Charm, Baldemar Rivas, M.L. Sanapo, Leonardo Rodrigues/Joe Prado/Jonas Trindade, Artists; Nick Filardi, Enrica Angiolini, Hi-Fi, Colorists
Ray – 8.5/10
Ray: DC has been doing a great job with their anthologies lately, both in the holiday one in December and the Black History Month one just last week. So how does this year’s Valentine’s Day special stack up?
We kick things off with the title story, “How To Lose A Guy Gardner In 10 Days” by Porter and Robles. Featuring the oddball pairing of Guy and Vicki Vale, it sends up the movie of the same name, with Vicki writing an article about what it’s like to date a superhero and picking possibly the worst one for the job. Guy, naturally, is a horrible date and alienates her every way he can—but proves to have some hidden layers under the hilarious jerkassery. Very funny Guy story, but maybe a bit rushed in the turnaround.
Waltke and Shavrin are the creative team on “Robots Are Red, Androids Are Blue,” a Red Tornado story that revisits Tornado’s marriage. It’s Valentine’s Day, and Tornado has volunteered to man the watchtower while his friends go to their loved ones. Accompanied by a new AI created by Batman, he thinks back to his marriage to Dr. Sutton and how it fell apart (although their daughter Traya, who played a key role in YJ, isn’t mentioned). It’s a melancholy story, but one with an unexpectedly uplifting ending—if you’re not especially worried about the current AI boom, at least.
“Too Many First Dates,” written and drawn by Marguerite Sauvage, takes us back to the early days of Barry and Iris’ relationship. Things go haywire on their first date as Barry gets called away on a Flash case, the date falls apart—and he goes back in time to fix it. This results in hundreds of trips back and forth on the cosmic treadmill, as fixed crises cause new problems, until some wise words from Jay and Joan give him a new perspective on all the little mishaps. A great, in-character story with gorgeous art—but geez, Barry, this is how we got Flashpoint!
“Golden Pairs” by Lore, Brandt, and Stein is a Booster Gold tale that finds him trying to launch a dating coach career—only to be ripped off by a con artist traveling in time. So naturally, he has to chase the guy down in the timestream, leading both of them into a complex, tangled scheme involving another supervillain and a surprising romantic connection for Booster. This is frantic and funny in places, but also seems to take Booster’s smug jerkass qualities up to eleven and move way too fast in places.
Speaking of turning the clock back, Constantine and his old friend Gary Lester take the lead in “Never Been Kissed” by Galer and Charm. Set when the two are children, it finds Gary obsessed with a girl he wants to get his first real kiss from. Constantine, naturally, comes up with some crazy schemes that are illustrated in brilliant cartooning reminiscent of Peanuts in places. Some of these scenes are hilarious, but others are oddly touching and hint at how Constantine loved Gary—which makes the ending mood whiplash all the more devastating. This isn’t just the best story in the book, it’s one of the best Constantine stories I’ve read in a while.
Dennis Hopeless and Baldemar Rivas take the helm for “Love’s A Stretch,” a Plastic Man story which takes place over several years and focuses on Eel’s most consistent human connection—a diner waitress who is the only one who tells it to him like it is as he goes from one disposable love interest to another. Of course, Eel is a con artist by trade—which makes the final twist in this story all the more clever. This feels like a great foundation for a Plastic Man series, and I’m hoping we’ll see more from Hopeless.
“Say Yes To The Mess” by Hay and Sanapo has Wonder Woman dealing with an annual problem—every weirdo trying to proposition her on Valentine’s Day. From villains staging robberies to lure her out to Guy Gardner faking a nuclear attack so he can play hero, it appears she’s the most popular woman out there—and she and Etta Candy come up with a plan to put a stop to it. She says yes to all the requests—and pulls off something that really only Wonder Woman could do. Odd story, but funny.
Finally, “Date Night” by George Mann and Leonardo Rodrigues finds Dick and Barbara trying to enjoy the night—with no Bat-stuff. Cass and Steph are trying to hold down the fort, but a large-scale attack involving fear gas is planned, and soon the lovebirds are called back into action. This is a fun story, very fast-paced, with a tone that definitely seems to match the current Nightwing series. It’s also good to see the Batgirls back in action, even if they do get jobbed out a little too easily here, especially Cass.
Overall, a solid if a bit messy issue, with one all-time classic story in here.
To find reviews of all the DC issues, visit DC This Week.
GeekDad received this comic for review purposes.
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