For some, February 14th is Valentine’s Day. A day to celebrate your love for that very special someone…. ::ICK!::
Okay. I couldn’t even type that first sentence without feeling sick. Seriously. Let’s call Valentine’s Day what it really is…Forced Affection Day! And myself and fellow GeekMom Karen Walsh have plenty of reasons why our distaste runs deep.
1.) The endless supply of pink and red on everything from flowers to clothes to jewelry to food.
2.) Cards with, let’s face it, meaningless verses of love and devotion that will be thrown away by the next day, along with the hours you spent trying to find the “perfect” card.
3.) It’s a Hallmark holiday with the sole purpose of making money off of people who feel guilty if they don’t get a loved one something.
4.) Disturbing stuffed animals in all species and sizes with “I love you” or “I’m wild about you” or other cheesy pickup lines written on silk hearts. Talk about a creepy way of wasting $10.
5.) Candy with lovey-dovey quotes on them. I ate them as a kid and as an adult, I no longer wonder why my taste buds hate me.
6.) Meaningless show of affection. If you need a holiday to be reminded to show someone you love them, you need more help than the silken heart holding teddy bear can provide.
7.) The guilt from others if you don’t acknowledge them. As a kid, everyone had to get a Valentine whether you liked them or not. I’m sorry, but I was bullied by most of the kids in my class. I wouldn’t give them candy unless it was laced with something like a diuretic.
8.) You get put in the social “penalty box” if you are not with someone and in turn, single people go out trying to find someone just so they don’t have to be alone. Guess what? Don’t settle for a one night stand of a date just because Hallmark tells you it’s that time of year. Save that desperation for New Years Eve.
9.) Gifts. Gifts. Gifts. The expectation that if you are with someone, a gift of some kind will magically appear on Valentines Day. Jewelry goes on sale, stuffed animals with every cheesy line printed on them, and more candy than Halloween adorns the aisles in every store. A holiday that is supposed to support the showing of affection has turned into a gift-giving step-child of Christmas.
10.) If you are with someone, then society makes you feel like you have to have sex. Call me a rebel, but I’m not going to let Hallmark tell me when my husband and I should “Netflix and chill.” True romance isn’t marked on a calendar and laced with price gouged chocolates, cheap teddy bears, and overpriced lingerie.
11.) My husband, and fellow Valentine’s Day loather, would like for me to mention the growing pressure on men to perform on Valentine’s Day. Having to whip out the romantic plans and sweep your woman off her feet with gifts, dinner, and everything in between puts a strain on the men who have no skill in the romance department or would like to do something not so grand.
While my reasons are on one end of the spectrum, GeekMom Karen takes on the other side and the hate runs deep.
– When your birthday is the day after, and everyone thinks it’s acceptable to combine the two.
No. I was born on the 15th thank you very much. They are two different days.
– The switch to Galentines. Guess what? I appreciate all my friends all the time. Cheapening those friendships by trying to piggyback off the way romantic love is cheapened just for marketing purposes furthers the well of cheapening interpersonal relationships.
– Forcing my kid to write a class worth of Valentines. For serious? I can’t get him to sit long enough to eat a breakfast bar. 22 little tiny cards? Oh no.
– Overachieving mommies who add candy or treats to the stupid Valentines. I know your kid isn’t buying 22 heart decorated pencils. Give it up. Please (actually, I could do a whole post on this one).
– The miserable, overpriced “special menus” at restaurants. Oh, come on. Anyone who watches Chopped or Top Chef knows that a mass produced meal of that nature, no matter the restaurant, is basically the Grade F meat of the institution. Yet, people feel so much pressure to go out to someplace fancy, they’ll take anything.
Let’s hear from our fellow loathers! Tell us your reasons for despising Valentine’s Day in the comments!
1 thought on “Happy Forced Affection Day! My Reasons for Loathing Valentine’s Day.”
My wife and I will do the same thing we’ve done for the past decade: give each other a sappy card and enjoy a homemade heart-shaped pizza. Valentine’s (like every other holiday) can be exactly what you make it.
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