Ten Things My Geek-Brain Makes Me Do

GeekMom Science

brainGeek-brains are wired differently than non-geek brains. We hyper-obsess over strange things, we remember obscure details of inconsequential events, we have little to no shame when it comes to the things we geek out over. We might be firmly opposed to going in public in just our bra and panties, but paint them gold and call it a Leia Slave-Girl Outfit and we are game.

This same geek-brain, so gifted in its own way, has trouble with things that non-geek brains breeze through. Things like remembering daily tasks without needing six alarms and a post-it stuck to the steering wheel, the ability to determine the difference between a pink sock and a black sock in the dark, and the desire to control public outbursts of obsessive behavior all come naturally to the non-geeks.

At one point, before I understood what it was to be a geek, I thought I was going insane. At least a little bit. My geek-wired brain operated on a whole different wavelength, I just couldn’t figure out why. When combined with mom-brain I was pretty sure I’d spend my retirement (and early 30s) in the sanitarium. My salvation was granted by a certain book-loving friend of mine who seemed to suffer from many of the same afflictions I did. She was a self-proclaimed geek and loved being so.

Perhaps many of you have a few geek-brain moments. For me, knowing that others had the same problem helped me reconcile my own. I offer you the same chance my book-geek friend unknowingly offered me. My list of ten things my geek-brain makes me do is as follows:

  1. While driving on the interstate I’m prone to panicking because I cannot find my car keys. (Don’t get it? Think harder.)
  2. I often have an uncontrollable urge to crouch and whisper while reading an email I know I’ve been blind-copied (BCC’d) on.
  3. I’ll get my phone out to check the time, do seventeen other things on it, silence it, and put it away before remembering that I wanted to check the time.
  4. It seemed a perfectly healthy trade to endure two weeks of ramen noodle lunches because EA Games was having an App sale over Christmas. Blood pressure and sodium be damned, Boggle is only $0.99!
  5. My mind goes entirely numb at 2:30 every afternoon and I can never remember if it is 2:30AM or PM.
  6. I repeatedly light and then blow out candles just to watch the whispy smoke curl from the wick.
  7. As part of a chemistry demonstration, I blow things up in frighteningly close proximity to my body on a daily basis. I light huge columns of flame within inches of my hair, eyebrows, and skin to explain the science behind explosions. But I’m scared to pull baking dishes out of the oven.
  8. Although I know it’s wrong and I should be a bigger person than this, I lose a little respect for people who confuse “your” and “you’re” and “to,” “two,” and “too” in professional emails.
  9. Spending three hours re-organizing my digital filing system on my laptop is fine with me. Getting caught at an intersection for more than one red light cycle makes me want to curse.
  10. I tend to get carried away in subtle ways.
  11. When I encounter a stranger in some brief way such as the check-out line or in traffic, I assign them names in my head and then create backstories at will. These are often integrated into my writing. I do this simply so I can say all of my characters are based in reality and only be partially fabricating.

May this be a comfort and boon to you in your geekiest geek-brain moments.

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17 thoughts on “Ten Things My Geek-Brain Makes Me Do

  1. Hooray! I am right there with you. These examples are so great. Here’s another one: this morning I got all worked up because my car doors were iced shut. A neighbor came by to help out. Then I realized they were *still locked*. As my son puts it, “Mommy, you are so smart … and so dumb at the same time.” Amen to that.

  2. So it’s not just me! I’m not alone in the world!! And, right or wrong, I completely lose respect for people who cannot figure out which form of “you’re” or “to” or “there” is grammatically correct. Professional or persona emails, it is one of my biggest pet peeves.

    Geek brain + mama brain = early dementia for me.

  3. In item 8 switch “its” for “it’s” (4th word). “It’s” is a contraction of “it is”. “Its” indicates possession. I wouldn’t ordinarily point this sort of thing out, but read item 8 again and you may find the humor.

  4. An hour and a half, it has been live for an hour and a half before someone caught it and spoke up. You are right Garet. It was on purpose given the nature of number 8 ( see number 10).

    1. On #8, Garet is actually incorrect – you, JennT, do not “possess” wrong – you were saying “I know it is wrong…”

      And what about there, their & they’re? They did not even get an honorable mention in your rant – /ha – I was SO tempted to say “you’re” rant, but I refrained.

  5. My husband sent me this post, lovingly pointing out #1, 3, 9, 10 & 11 are why he loves me. I am left wondering what kind of a search he must have been doing to find this…. maybe “how to teach your wife to remember daily tasks without needing to use the oven timer as an reminder alarm?”

    Thanks Geekmom!! Great blog and now I have definitive proof others exist like me!

  6. I, too, judge people based on homophones. Just yesterday my regard for the president of our company went down three clicks because of “their” misuse.

    (And yes, I gauge things in clicks. Because it makes sense to me.)

  7. I do every one of these, or something similar enough to count. I love the list but I have to say, it’s making me twitch that there are eleven items on the list of “Ten Things…”, lol. 🙂

    1. Just read it, and this is the first thing I noticed, and it cracked me up cause it was so obviously on purpose!

      There are three kinds of people in the world: Those who can count, and those who can’t.

  8. This list had Hubby and I laughing the whole way through. Though I must admit, the last one is absolutely creepy. Have you been in my head?! How did you know?! 😉

  9. Ok, I don’t do #11, but my daughters must! They are constantly asking where people in other cars are going and why.

    As a biologist I am perfectly comfortable sharing a tent with a spider or handling arachnids and insects in a class, but if one shows up in my house, I have to call my husband to deal with it!

    1. Amen to #3 (distracted by the phone, forgetting to check the time). I have the same problem with the Internet at work. I get online to find one tiny piece of information for a project and… I get distracted. I read blogs. I post comments. Case in point, I got online 45 minutes ago to find… something… I can’t remember… And here I am.

  10. Number 1 is so familiar but in a different way. The other day I spent 20 minutes hunting for my iphone, getting increasingly panicky. It was only after that time and now totally freaked out, that I realised I was talking on it to my mum!

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