I Always Pick The Slowest Line

You may appreciate the opportunity to wait in line. Perhaps it gives you the chance to teach your children Latin verbs or to practice inner peace. But the rest of us indulge in quasi-mathematical speculations about which line is moving faster. Such speculations are not only futile, they lead us to bitter conclusions about fickle fate in a vast unknowable universe.

For the facts about waiting in line, check out engineer Bill Hammack’s explanation. He’s inspired me to start patronizing stores that use the “combined queue” method. Or at least to use my time better. Now repeat after me: maneo manere mansi mansum

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