It’s been a whole year. I’ve drawn one comic a week for a whole year.
I feel like I should be more – more excited, more proud, more invigorated. Instead, I’m just kinda here. I had an art reception featuring the comic and it was great. I met a bunch of people in my community that I hadn’t met before. I had the opportunity to talk about where my ideas came from and why I’m doing this. I suppose that was a bit of a celebration all on its own.
It hasn’t been an easy year, but we’ve gotten through it. The comic is a great big memory book of Alice’s childhood. It’s full of firsts. First events, first friends, first goofy moments, and first sad ones too. It has definitely been the most interesting way to document our lives. I hope someday to look back on all of this and feel different. Accomplished, maybe?
Notice the little ghost kitty over Wayne’s shoulder? That’s Seuss. She was 16 years old and not doing well. We said goodbye to her this weekend. Alice was asking for her this morning. So I explained to my 18-month-old daughter that Seuss is gone. She died. She isn’t coming back. But that’s okay. It’s the natural order of things. We all are born, we live, and we all die someday.
Alice didn’t understand. I still told her the truth anyway because that’s the type of person that I am. We also just lost the wife of a friend. She was a beautiful lady inside and out that I had hoped to get to know better. We knew it was coming so it wasn’t a surprise but it’s still hard. I feel like I missed out on something spectacular.
I’m not my usual self. That’s okay too. I forgive myself for that. It’s like there is too much happening right now. Happy things and sad things; two extremes of the spectrum fighting for dominance. I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel. I don’t know what I’m supposed to say. I just don’t know right now.
Wayne bought Alice this tube thing that she can crawl through. He does that. He buys us things just because. And Alice is having a blast crawling through, sitting inside and eating her snacks, stealing Wayne’s hat and hiding in the tube … so that’s what I’ll do today. I’ll watch Alice smile, laugh, and play. I’ll watch her enjoy and discover. I’ll eventually stop rambling and get back to whatever it is that I do with myself all day.
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